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What’s Football?

Before marrying my husband, I could count the number of times I had watched football on one hand. And those times involved Super Bowl parties with great food and lots of friends to distract me from the mundane activity of actually watching the game.

Then I met my husband Nick. He watched football, talked football, played football, coached football. You get the idea. If a football was involved, he was interested. I can safely say that the number of football games I watched quickly outgrew my fingers and that was just the first couple of months of marriage! 🙂

To be fair, I did find a certain joy in watching Nick coach his young football team. It was obvious Nick was in his element on the sidelines. I even started to follow and understand a few of the basics of the game so I could have a respectable conversation after the game. However, that was about as far as I could say that my football interest grew.

As the past few football seasons passed, Nick would watch his football games on TV once a week (he is great about only watching his team play so it doesn’t hone in on all his free time for which I am VERY grateful!)

But I could tell it disappointed him when I would spend all my time doing anything but watching the game with him. He grew up watching each game with his dad and talking and analyzing every play and genuinely enjoying family companionship during those times.

So being the good Christian wife I am, I tried to watch. It usually put me to sleep before the first quarter was over. I just wasn’t excited about keeping track of who was playing or what the defense was lacking that game or how it affected the team’s chances for the playoffs.

What’s Fantasy Football?

Two years ago, Nick suggested I try to set up a Fantasy Football team with him. My first thought was, “What is that?” My second thought was “NOOO!!!” But Nick was so excited about us both having our own team that I agreed to it.

For those out there who were as uninformed about Fantasy Football as I was, basically you pick players from any team to create your own “fantasy” team that plays games each week based on the real players performances in real life. (Confusing enough for you?)

The stats and rankings were interesting to me as Nick guided me through how to draft a team, what positions I needed to consider, and how to check their rankings. Most of my decisions the first time we drafted players was on how much a liked a player’s name. (That is not the most scientific way to play the game, trust me!) 🙂

Each week, I followed my individual players and their stats as we watched the games together. Before I knew it, I wasn’t taking naps near as often during games and I was talking to Nick intelligently about the game. Okay, maybe not super intelligently but he gave me the benefit of the doubt and encouraged my interest none the less!

Once I won my first game on Fantasy Football, my competitive nature was thrilled and I started to follow football news with Nick. Talk about a change from the previous years of sleeping through all the games!

How Fantasy Football Helped Me Grow Closer to My Husband

So what does playing Fantasy Football have to do with being a good Christian wife you might ask?

Well, a lot, in fact, as I have learned. My husband doesn’t have many hobbies or interests outside of reading (the very thing that brought us together as a couple!) So to him, it was important that one of the other big areas of his life he was able to share with me. He has supported me in my many crazy hobbies (like Cricut card making, geocaching, piano playing, blogging, etc.) This was my way to engage with him where his interests and passions lay.

Study your husband.

Football obviously interested my husband. I knew that. What took me quite a while to realize was that he wanted to share that interest with me. Take the time to prayerfully study your husband. See what hobbies or activities cause him to light up.

You might be surprised at what you find interests your man!

Ask questions.

If your husband is like almost every other human on the planet, he will love to share more about his passions with you-if you ask the right questions at the right time. I have found that if I ask Nick a football-related question during the commercial break, he is much happier to explain in detail what I don’t understand. Unlike five minutes earlier when he is zoned in on the most important play of the game.

Find appropriate times to seek out your husband’s knowledge on his interests.

Support his interest.

Don’t you love when your hubby lets you have an afternoon to go shopping or to make make crafts uninterrupted or pursue whatever interest you have? Well, return that favor!

Perhaps there is a convention nearby that will allow him to learn more about his hobby. Let him go and if he wants, join him too! We all know how the pressures of everyday life can get a person down. It helps to have a supportive wife who will let him pursue quality down time.

Find a way to join him in his interest.

This one can be the hardest. It is one thing to be kind and learn more about his interest or to let him go pursue his hobby, it can be an entirely other thing to join him in doing it. This can lead to sacrifice on your part, both of your own time and even sometimes your own interests.

However, keep in mind the words from Philippians 2:4, “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” This is a the very example Christ Jesus set for us as His followers! Let us bring this Christ-like attitude to our marriages, even to our hobbies and interests.

Growing closer as a couple is hard, especially in the early years of job promotions, young children, educational opportunities, and financial strains. Don’t forget to take time to build your relationship with your spouse in the fun areas of life-even if this means making a Fantasy Football team! 🙂

Resources To Help You Along

The 5 Love Languages This book has done more to help my husband and I connect and show our love to one another than any other book outside of the Bible. We love the practical applications that we were able to make from what we learned through this book!

For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men I read this book during our first year of marriage and it was a HUGE eye opener to me into the thought life of men. Basically, the author interviewed thousands of men in each age category and walk of life and shares her findings from a Christian worldview. By far, the best chapter is when she addresses the fact that men are visual. Her examples throughout that chapter have done more to help me reevaluate how men (mainly my husband) see the world around them! If you only get to read one book on this list, read this one!! (Bonus, it is a super quick and easy read!)

Love & Respect Study Set In full disclosure, I found this book more interesting and helpful than my husband did. The writing style frustrated him as it felt it was talking down to him a little but he said that he still agreed with the general ideas and sentiments that were being put forth. Personally, I enjoyed seeing how the cycle of feeling disrespected and unloved could snowball to a point where neither spouse even wants to try anymore.

Your Turn

How about you? What are some interests your husband has that you have spent shared time with him in the past?

What are some ways you can find to take practical steps to meet your husband where he is at?

Please take a few minutes to share in the comments. I love hearing from my readers!

Thanks for stopping by!

 

 

 

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